Show and Tell 03.18.26

Back with another installment of my Show and TELL series – here’s what I’m trying, eyeing, loving and learning this spring.

TRYING

My Southern Kitchen recipes | If you follow Southern Living on Instagram, you’ve seen Ivy Odom’s videos. I ordered her cookbook, My Southern Kitchen, a few weeks ago and ended up bookmarking about 2 dozen recipes I want to try this year. As I was poring over the text, Andrew said “Are you… reading? A cookbook?” But her write-ups for each recipe are so fun and nostalgic! This cookbook is more for get-togethers and occasions, not so much for simple weeknight dinners, but I’m excited to challenge myself in the kitchen and try some things out of my comfort zone. Plus, there are some twists on some southern classics that I want to become more familiar with. Fried chicken, banana pudding, homemade sweet tea – there’s no excuse for me not to have at least attempted some of these at this point in my life.

These last few years I’ve really forced myself to try more things in the kitchen and it’s been so gratifying, so I’m excited to make my way through these recipes and hopefully have a few more excuses to host friends in the process.

Growing herbs and cherry tomatoes | We’re trying our hand at some different herbs this year, along with some cherry tomatoes from seeds. Attempting to not overwater things this time around (my biggest gardening downfall) by remembering a little nugget from Joanna Gaines’ children’s book We Are the Gardeners – herbs have manners. They like to sip, not gulp!

EYEING

For the first time in our entire marriage, I actually sent my husband links for things I’d like when he asked me what I wanted for my birthday. I know – huge. I’ve always been a birthday minimalist but this year, I’ve got my eye on a few things and wouldn’t mind opening any of them for the big 3-6! I sent him these earrings, this cap (so I’ll quit stealing his), and this velvety Jo Malone perfume. I haven’t worn perfume since high school, and especially not since I’ve been trying to be more conscious of what I put in and on my body, but this smells so good I don’t even care.

Speaking of gifting – I needed to get a gift for a friend a few weeks ago, and it was someone I’d never bought a gift for. I texted her sister for gift ideas and she sent back a screenshot of a Note on her phone: Gift Ideas for ___. It had things she likes and is into (baking, gardening, champagne), things she’s not into (coffee, for example), things she does for hobbies and relaxation – it was just ten or so things but it pointed me in the right direction and was SO incredibly helpful. I think everyone needs to keep a list like this! Especially for kids, too. I love when I text another parent to ask what their child might like for their birthday and they say “They’re really into ___ or they would love ___ toy.” THANK YOU. We’re gonna give the gifts anyway, so let’s just make it easy on each other and get what we actually like and will use!

LOVING

Home finds | A new living room rug that finally feels like the rug we should’ve had in there all along, and vintage Texas coffee table books I found at a precious little antique store in Johnson City when I stopped on a whim on the way to Fredericksburg. Things that make our home feel more us!

Hilmy Cellars winery in Fredericksburg | Speaking of Fredericksburg, when I went with my girls in February I stopped by this winery on my way into town. Andrew and I had done a tasting at Hilmy Cellars back in 2018 and both agreed their wine was the best of any we’d tried that trip, so I wanted to stop in again and grab a few bottles to take back home for him. When we opened a bottle of their cab after dinner and poured ourselves a glass, we both just sighed that sigh when something’s almost too good for words.

I don’t know what’s different about their grapes or their process, but the difference is stark. I already can’t wait to go back for more (or maybe I’ll just join their wine club?) plus now they have a full kitchen – with a shakshuka pizza on the menu! We started making shakshuka at home a few years ago – a pizza version sounds amazing. If you’re in Fredericksburg anytime soon, make a stop at Hilmy.

Entering my baseball mom era | I’ve looked forward to being to be a baseball mom since the day we found out it was two boys! And somehow they’re already four and a half, starting their first activity of their own after sitting on the sidelines (a.k.a. the dance studio waiting room) for most of their lives. It’s finally their turn! I had to laugh – after our first t-ball practice, Hayes saw another little boy drinking a Gatorade and said “Hey, what’s that?” Ohhh, sweet boy. Many Gatorades are in your future!

LEARNING

How helpful it is to only keep half of my closet in sight at a time | I recently swapped the fall/winter clothes in my closet for my spring/summer wardrobe, packing up the cold weather things and leaving only warm weather things hanging up. Keeping my out-of-season clothes packed away, out of sight/out of mind, has been more helpful than I ever realized it would be when I started doing this a few years ago. Obviously for visual clutter purposes – it’s easier to see my options when clothes aren’t crowded and bunched together– but there were times as I was grabbing things from my spring/summer bin to hang up again that I thought “Oh, I forgot I even had that and I'm not that excited about it” (to the donate pile it goes) AND there were things that I thought “Oh I'm so excited to wear this again this spring!” Not seeing things for a while really changes your perspective. Same thing as I was putting my fall/winter clothes away– as I folded up each piece I thought “Did I even wear this at all this season?” Seasonal swapping really forces you to edit your wardrobe and be intentional, and it’s helped me keep my closet so much more manageable!

How much I need His mercy | I started Paul David Tripp’s New Morning Mercies devotional last year and have really been enjoying the simple, straight-to-the-point, way he reflects on God’s unending mercy. It’s just one page a day, with an accompany Bible chapter that goes along with each devotional, but his words have helped me look at the gospel from different angles and what it means for my life in new ways. I recently heard a clip from a podcast with Lauren Akins and she was asked “What is God teaching you right now?” I considered the same question for myself and in this season, I think it’s that He’s helping me to realize that I need the good news and mercy of the gospel more than I thought I did.

Growing up in church, I remember many sermons and discussions about grace, but I don’t really remember the flipside of that conversation. There was a whole lot of grace and goodness talk, but not a lot of sin and inadequacy talk. The gospel was framed as more of a nice thing than a necessary one. It was more just “God loves you so much and He loves you exactly the way you are.” Which sounds great, and He does love us endlessly. But it leaves out an important part of the equation – the depravity that we cannot overcome and the fact that we are not, in fact, good enough for Him, exactly as we are, because He is a just and fair God. If we were good enough on our own, if we were adequate, Jesus wouldn’t have needed to die. The gospel wouldn’t be the gospel.

So as an adult, wrapping my mind around the innate terribleness of humans, wrestling with how that works with us being made by God in his image… it took a little while for me to get there, mentally. But realizing how much I need God’s grace because I truly don’t deserve it and cannot do a single thing to earn it anyway… it makes the gospel so much more integral and meaningful for me.

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That’s a wrap for some springtime show and tell. Thanks for reading!

Show and Tell 01.21.26

I told myself I’d start blogging more after saying goodbye to my photography business and going back to my roots here on The Big and Bright, which began in 2014 as a blog. Well, that was August and this is January, and the posts have been few and far between. After running a business for ten years that required me to show up online and consistently be creatively polished, a break was much needed. I haven’t been in as much of a sharing mood in general these days, embracing all things homeschooling, homemaking, and homebody-ing… (a homebody always, but the other two – who woulda thought??). But I do miss blogging just for the hell of it, writing just to write, and I really miss the freedom to share whatever I felt like without worrying tying it up in a pretty little bow for Instagram.

After a conversation with a friend about the rise of Substack and how it reminds me of the days of Xanga (lol) and the early blogging days, when blogs were actually blogs, before Instagram and influencing, I was inspired to start sharing on here again. Honest thoughts and snippets of life, but with the structure of a series to help keep me motivated. So, here’s the first installment of what I’m calling Show and Tell, or T.E.L.L. (because I can’t resist an acronym), where I’ll be sharing hopefully monthly about things I’m Trying, Eyeing, Loving, and Learning.

TRYING

Walking | What a novelty, I know! For the last 2 years, I’ve been pretty consistent with strength training (using the Moves app – can’t say enough great things about it!), but after the holidays I felt like my body was really craving some gentler movement again for a while. I’ve been walking just for 30 minutes 4 or 5 days a week and it’s been so refreshing! I love my walking pad for colder days.

Film camera | I’ve had an old Canon film camera for years, but hadn’t used it since high school and was a little bit intimidated to start again. I needed to reteach myself how to load it and use it and I just wasn’t ready to re-commit, but after I got on a disposable camera kick last year, I wanted to keep that going without having to keep buying disposables. A few YouTube videos later, the old Canon is back in business and I’m excited to see what I can capture this year on film!

“When you get a chance” | Working for the last few months on making this phrase a go-to in our house, especially with the boys. They’re getting better at prefacing their requests with “Mom, when you get a chance, can you please ___” and it’s so refreshing to hear. They’re learning that most of their requests aren’t as urgent as they think they are; they’re pausing to notice and recognize what I’m in the middle of, they’re interrupting way less often… if you’re feeling snappy with your preschoolers amidst the million requests and demands each day, add this one to their repertoire.

Rowe Casa Hair Spritz | 35 has not been kind to me in the hormone or hair department, and in my desperation last fall, I dropped some $$$ on Divi’s scalp serum in hopes to combat some thinning spots around my hair line and part. Unfortunately I haven’t loved anything about it – it makes my hair super greasy and I was having to plan my hair wash schedule/hat-wearing days around applying it, it drips everywhere, and I just looked like a wet, greasy mess. I kept seeing ads for Rowe Casa’s hair spritz, essentially for the same purpose, and thought for $39 it would be worth trying. So far, so good! It dries really nicely. Wish I would’ve skipped the Divi mess and gone with Rowe Casa in the first place!

EYEING

Swimsuits | I love my Summersalt suits but I’m in serious need of a couple more options to add to my rotation before this summer. Must have decent bum coverage (why is this so rare?!). MUST come in Long Torso. I was ready to invest in a Hunza G after seeing them for years, but then I walked into Walmart the other day and was SO impressed by their cute spring swimsuit collection. Two totally different ends of the quality spectrum I’m sure, but the Walmart selection is still intriguing. Might have to do both – Hunza G for a one piece, Walmart for a two piece since the long torso part doesn’t matter there. Going back to try some on asap!

Gallery wall finds for the boys’ room | This has been a long time coming, but after finally finding the perfect red rug (proud of myself for choosing COLOR!) for their room, I’ve started collecting things for their walls and can’t wait for their room to feel complete. Savage Sam is one of Andrew’s favorite childhood movies and the boys love it now too – I found a Golden Book of it from the 60s that I can’t wait to frame alongside some very special pieces.

LOVING

A slower homeschool pace this semester | Last fall was our first semester of homeschooling. Figuring out our groove, tweaking our schedule as we went, and learning SO. MUCH. along the way. I started out the school year trying to approach things from a “if we finish we finish, if we don’t, whatever” more loosey goosey mindset, and honestly, that’s just not me. I am Type A through and through, and while I feel like that’s not represented as much in many of the homeschool spheres online (like maybe it feels frowned upon to be a more rigid homeschool mom? Because flexibility and ditching “norms” is one of the main benefits of homeschooling in the first place?), I’ve learned that for us, having clear plans laid out brings more peace to our days, and a lack of structure brings the opposite. I love our open-and-go books, but sometimes I need more open-and-tell-me-when-to-stop. Over Christmas break I mapped out our entire second semester in more detail, setting objectives for each month and each week, still with wiggle room but with clear stopping points for each day, too.

The other factor in our pace dilemma was figuring out that Kindergarten wasn’t the level she needed for Language Arts and Math. One of those things you don’t know until you dive in and give things a little time, but a few weeks into the fall, I knew she’d do better with first grade curriculum. That’s the beauty of homeschool – being able to meet her where she’s at! Then it was a matter of bridging the gap, figuring out exactly which parts of Kindergarten to skip (most) and which parts she still needed to review (some), and then purchasing/getting into a new groove with first grade books. But we’re all caught up now, doing just one short lesson a day in each subject, feeling relaxed, unhurried but knowing she’s exactly where she needs to be, on track to finish in early May and start again in August working a full grade ahead. I’m absolutely blown away by all that she’s learning and capable of already, and it truly is one of the greatest joys of my life to have been able to teach her at home this year and savor our days spent together.

Aura Frame | Truth be told, I’d never had any desire for a digital frame until this one. I just didn’t think they did photos justice. If a photo was worth displaying, it was worth doing it “right” in a real frame, with a mat and some intentionality behind it. Enter: the Aura Frame. My sister-in-law got one for my in-laws for Christmas, and as soon as she set it up at their house I went to the website and bought one for my parents. The app interface/photo sharing features and the smart photo pairing are so cool! My brother and I both have the app and can easily send photos to our parents’ frame – it’s a fun way to stay connected. After seeing my parents’ frame all set up, I couldn’t resist getting one for our house too, and the kids have been loving it (to the point where we’ve had to turn it off during meal times because they’d sit there asking a million questions about each photo, not eating - lol). We have the Carver 10” mat frame in Clay, which shows one landscape photo at a time or two portrait photos at a time at whatever interval you set.

Our family yearbooks are wonderful, and I’m still always team #printyourphotos, but we’re not flipping through those daily and I hated that we have so many beautiful photos that we don’t get to see every day. I’m reminded of so many more sweet memories now – our wedding photos, vacation photos, everyday moments with the kids – and it makes me smile all day long!

Valentines day tags | I couldn’t resist some DIY tags after seeing ideas for animal cracker and pirates booty valentines. Canva for the win!

LEARNING

How to cook on stainless steel | Andrew (the real chef in our household) had been wanting stainless steel pans for years so we splurged on a set in 2024 – and then I spent most of 2025 hating them. Everything stuck and it just pissed me off every time I cooked until I FINALLY learned how to use them correctly. Turns out the missing ingredient was patience (lol) and if you just give the pan a few minutes to really heat up on medium before turning things down to low, adding your butter or oil and then giving that a few minutes to get nice and hot, things don’t stick at all. I don’t dread washing pans anymore and it’s so nice!

It really is your screen time | There’s a reel going around along the lines of – “Your house isn’t ugly, your screen time is just too high. Your clothes are fine, your screen time is just too high. There’s nothing wrong with your face, your screen time is just too high. You’re not doing a bad job as a mom, your screen time is just too high” etc. etc. etc. and you know what? They ain’t wrong. All these things we devote so much time and energy to, that I’m sure we wouldn’t care HALF as much about if not for constantly being bombarded with comparison and noise. I feel like there’s been a shift lately across the board, a general feeling of disenchantment with all the overconsumption - the hauls, the houses, the links upon links upon links.

Don’t get me wrong, I like sharing the things I love too. I’m not completely against it all. So I feel a little hypocritical saying all this, but even as someone who just enjoys sharing things with my friends, not trying to make an income from it, not sharing (or buying) hauls for the hell of it, it’s still just… a lot. And we have the choice to not engage with so much of it.

We’re a generation trying not to raise iPad kids but never far away from our own devices and I’ve been feeling the tug of it all – community and creativity vs. privacy and peace… It had been weighing on me and I really started thinking a lot about what my kids might remember about me and my phone usage (going back to one of my favorite writings on motherhood – what are the “always” statements your kids will say about you some day?). I just really, really don’t want them to say “she was always on her phone.”

Since the start of the year, I’ve cut my average screen time down significantly… like, by hours a day, which is so embarrassing to admit but also probably not uncommon. These are the main things that have helped make habits easier to break:

1) Mass unfollowing and blocking of the big-time influencers. It’s weird to me that some of us have been following some of the big names for over a decade now. We’ve watched their children grow up, we’ve watched them all build beautiful homes, we’ve watched haul after haul after haul… at the end of last year I just decided that as much as I liked these accounts, devoting my mental energy to them, spending so much of my TIME tuned into all of it and feeling annoyed or inadequate for whatever reason just wasn’t serving any fruitful purpose in my life. I unfollowed pretty much all of them, and to get my algorithm to quit showing me so much of those types of things, I blocked them too. Even ones I liked following! Sounds like overkill, maybe, but there’s a fine line between being inspired and coveting, and I found myself on the wrong side of that line too often.

2) The Brick. Probably my favorite purchase of 2025. The LIFE it’s given back to me, my gosh. My phone stays Bricked for 20-ish hours a day now, which means I’m locked out of certain apps until I physically tap my phone to the Brick device (it’s magnetic so mine lives on the fridge), and it is THE BEST. I block myself from access to all social media apps, the internet, email, shopping apps, even Zillow – anything that steals my attention in little pockets of the day, keeps me from being fully present when I need to be, or tempts me to scroll or shop. The rest of my phone still functions like normal and mostly I love that it takes self-control out of the equation. Bricking really does get addicting! A lot better than being addicted to the opposite. If you’ve been considering one, this referral link takes $10 off and let me tell ya, the ROI makes it absolutely worth every penny!

3. Putting the screen time widget on my home screen. That’ll humble ya REAL QUICK. A recommendation from @siececampbell who has a ton of helpful ways to rely less on your phone and embrace a more analog life.

4. Having plenty of alternative activities close by – @siececampbell recommends a small analog tote bag to make those things as accessible as your phone. I try to bring one or two things with me anytime I know I’ll have downtime, like waiting for Steele at dance or in the preschool pickup line. I got myself a book of crossword puzzles and the Q-Less game, and also love to toss a sketchpad or journal in there, plus books, devotionals, etc. Things to keep my hands and my mind occupied when I might otherwise want to scroll. And I love Emily Lex’s watercolor workbooks for nights at home!

5. Being okay with not being in the know. I’m not even talking Instagram things or trends, necessarily. I used to whip out my phone for anything and everything, just so I could KNOW. What does that word mean? Where is that plane going? What movie was that guy in? What’s the data on XYZ? What is so and so’s opinion on such and such? Is there anything on sale at ___ right now? Those little things added up to so much extra screen time for me and I finally decided I needed to be okay with not knowing all the answers to all the questions. And not knowing has been just fine so far.

It’s wild (although not surprising) how much more productive I’ve been and how peaceful I’ve felt lately. So many things I kept saying I didn’t have time for or just couldn’t get around to – no, I just wasn’t stewarding my time as well as I should’ve been most days. Still a work in progress but I’m so grateful for the shift.

I don’t really do resolutions or words of the year, but if I had to narrow it down, I think “slow and steady” and “kindness” are the words I’m going for this year. Slow and steady at home, being content and present, embracing an unhurried pace, and being kind to myself, my kids, and others. Cheers to 2026!

Ten Year Anniversary Trip | Spain on Film

The highlight of 2025: our ten year anniversary trip to Spain. We visited Mallorca and Barcelona and packed so much into seven short days back in June. This was a dream trip and I’m so glad I brought along a little Kodak disposable camera (yes, the kind from the 90s!) to document it. All the photos below are from that camera, not edited in any way. I was blown away by what it captured! Scroll through for some of our favorite bits and pieces of Spain on film.

I went back and forth about taking my big Canon with me, but ultimately decided I didn’t want to worry about keeping up with it or lugging it around (it’s heavy!). I looked into other small digital cameras like the G7X and film-look cameras like the CampSnap, but you just can’t beat the look of real film. I’m so happy with how these images from a good ole Kodak Fun Saver turned out, and while the price ain’t what it used to be, it was absolutely worth buying a 4-pack for our trip. I had the film processed by mPix (same lab I use for our family yearbooks) with a prepaid mailing label and the scans hit my inbox the day they received the cameras – great service as always. I highly recommend a disposable film camera to document your next vacation! I prefer the look of Kodak film (more golden tones vs. Fuji’s striking greens) but you can’t go wrong with any of the options below.

I did err on the side of caution and told the airport security agents I had film cameras with me – at DFW and Barcelona they told me not to worry about it; in Mallorca they did a quick hand check – not sure if that really made a difference but I didn’t want to find out the hard way if the scanners could damage the film or not. Worth the extra minute at security to be careful!

Our hotel in Mallorca, Hospes Maricel, blew us both away. The views of the pool and the ocean from our room, the service and spa, the food and drinks – we’d be back in a heartbeat. The Shameless Tourist found this gem for us – travel plans are not our forté so we decided to leave that to the experts for such a special trip and we are so grateful for the care and attention to detail they put into our itinerary. From restaurant recommendations and reservations to meaningful experiences like a tennis lesson at Rafa Nadal’s tennis academy, a sailing trip up the coast of Mallorca, a guided tour of the Sagrada Familia, and a tapas tour with a Barcelona local, they absolutely made the most of our budget and made this trip so incredibly enjoyable.

We ventured to Port de Soller for our sailing excursion and had the most beautiful day on the water with our guide. We stopped at 4 different spots to snorkel, paddleboard and explore but did plenty of relaxing, sunbathing, snacking and Cava sipping on the boat, too.

After a sailing day, a day of tennis at the Nadal Academy, and a day to relax and enjoy massages at our hotel, we had dinner at the marina in Palma on our last night in Mallorca before heading to Barcelona.

Street markets filled with treasures, sky-high cathedrals many centuries old, Gaudi’s mindblowing designs dotting the city, and quaint corner cafés abuzz at midnight… Barcelona was something special. We had one of those meals that leaves you speechless in this little spot at the back of Babula Restaurante after a day of exploring the city.

For the last night of our trip on our actual ten year anniversary (6/27), we enjoyed dinner with a view 250 feet above the city, overlooking Mount Tibidabo, the 1992 Olympic sites, the Sagrada Família, and everything in between. The menu at Altamar Barcelona was incredible, but watching the sunset with my husband, reminiscing on our trip and on ten years of marriage, talking about our hopes and dreams for the next ten and beyond… I’ll never forget it.

I’ll cherish all the photos from our trip, but these film images will forever be special to me. Grab a few disposables to toss in your carry-on the next time you travel – you won’t regret it!

A Bittersweet Goodbye After Ten Years of The Big and Bright

Ten years ago in April, I shot my first wedding. In two weeks, at the very same venue no less, I’ll shoot my last. And after wrapping up a few more upcoming newborn sessions and three days’ worth of mini sessions this fall, I’m officially hanging up the photographer hat after Thanksgiving, and saying goodbye to this business I’ve poured so much of myself into for the last decade. At least for a long while!

This was not in my plans before this month, but I can’t say it hadn’t been on my heart. Looking back, there are so many ways the Lord was preparing me for this and protecting me from things not meant for me, my family or my business.

family photos by maddie ray

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So why walk away now? Fall is always a photographer’s busiest time of year. The majority of my weekends between mid-August and mid-November are booked with some sort of session (I was booking weekdays only for a while, but with Andrew’s job demands and us not having any family close by to help, weekday sessions were becoming harder to make work on my end). As our kids get older, trying to fit my business into the little time we have to spend all together just isn’t feasible or sustainable anymore, even if I were to outsource more. It’s been wearing on my family, not just on me.

Our daughter starting kindergarten and our boys turning 4 this month really hit us hard. It’s all going by so fast. We’re acutely aware that this is the only childhood they get – it’s happening NOW – and we want to make the most of these years with them. We don’t want to look back and have regrets. We realized we can’t keep putting off traveling as a family or getting away for the weekend together, or even just savoring slow Saturdays at home. As I say to my twins all too often, “There’s only one mommy,” and there’s just not enough of me to go around anymore.

Andrew would’ve never asked me to step away, but I knew something had to give in order to prioritize what’s most important to us as our children enter such formative years, and I’ve felt such relief and peace about my decision. I’m sure it was no coincidence that the Sunday after I told him I wanted to call it quits later this fall, the message at church was about the Sabbath and general concept of rest. How God designed it for us, intentionally. The pastor compared it to the concept of tithing – something that in the moment can feel… wasteful? That’s a lot of money (tithing), and a lot of time (setting boundaries with rest) that we could be using productively… building our businesses, more more more… but at what cost? It’s human nature to be stingy with our money and our time, but He wants us to trust Him with both. And when we do, whether we see it or not, the fruits of that trust and obedience are always better than the fruits of our labor.

These last ten years have been more than I ever dreamed. I’ve had the honor of being welcomed into your homes, your wedding days, your surprises and announcements, capturing your families’ milestones, sharing in your biggest and brightest moments, getting to know so many of you and seeing you again and again over the years, from engagement to wedding, maternity to newborn sessions, your first family sessions and your second, third, fourth and beyond. Watching your children and your families grow. Finding an outlet for my creativity that stretched me in the best ways, that kept me inspired and excited about work for an entire decade. That’s something I don’t take for granted and I’ll of course miss those parts and the friends made along the way, immensely.

I’m going to savor this time of being able to focus solely on my family and our home and not worry about keeping up. I’ve been encouraged by some wonderful friends who’ve made similar moves in recent years and have no regrets whatsoever. I’ve learned not too hold too tightly to any plans (it really isn’t up to us anyway), so, as I’ve said a lot over the years – never say never. Who knows what’s in store for the future, but for now, the next several years at least, I’m being pulled to wear my wife and mom hat full time, and I’m so grateful for that.

Thank you for being here – for trusting me, for encouraging me, for every show of support along the way. The Big and Bright has always been about YOU and I hope you cherish the memories we’ve captured together for years and years to come!

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To my DFW families looking for someone new: these are, in no particular order, photographers I trust and whose newborn/family work I deeply admire!

Jordan Mitchell
Kristen Howell
Meghan Tidwell
Lakin Stearns
Maddie Ray
Taylor Pettigrew
Ana Dufreche
Tate Smith
Gaby Caskey

This website isn’t going anywhere (not with ten years of photos and blogs!) and I’ll most likely still blog occasionally – I enjoy sharing my favorite finds, our travels, organization tips and the systems that are working for us in our home, and ramblings on motherhood. I share all of those things on my personal Instagram and I’d love to stay in touch with all of you there!

Favorite Buys of 2023

Recapping my favorite buys throughout the year – I had some specific items and categories I wanted to focus my shopping efforts on in 2023, and some unexpected wins too. Here’s what I loved the most!

JEWELRY

Monica Vinader oval pendant + Amazon adjustable gold chain | after getting rid of a LOT of old/outdated jewelry (looking at you, Kendra Scott earrings), I was on the hunt for a few gold jewelry staples. This engraved oval necklace is my new everyday necklace and after searching high and low for a gold pendant I could do 3 lines of engraving on, I love how this one turned out. They include 2 sides of engraving, so I did our wedding year + the kids’ birth years in roman numerals on the front and home team on the back in script – it’s so special to me! With the 14-24” adjustable chain I can move it so the pendant hangs at just the right spot no matter what I’m wearing.

Brinker + Eliza heart necklace | I’ve loved this statement piece (stacks well too) – it would also be a great piece to engrave!

Julie Vos Savoy hoops | Became a big Julie Vos fan this past year. I’m eyeing more of her pieces but wide gold hoops like these had been on my wish list for a while and these fit the bill. Lightweight and good backings so they stay tight against your earlobe.

clothing

Joyspun t-shirt bra | A $13 Walmart find — no wires or seams but makes ‘em look alive without being a push-up. A winner!

Banana Republic wide-leg jeans | If you have wider hips/bigger thighs like me, these are worth a try. Not too tight, not too baggy. I got the black wash and this dark wash denim pair – love the raw hem and the pocket placement is perfect. (BR does come in Petite and Tall but I’m 5’10” and their talls are too long on me, FYI).

BEAUTY + FACE

Revision Brightening face wash | Magic. It truly does brighten your complexion immediately! A little goes a long way – it took me several months to finish a bottle using this every single morning.

Alpyn BHA Liquid Exfoliator | Added this to my routine in the spring (a bottle will last you 6+ months) after reading the insanely good reviews and have zero regrets. It’s helped with texture and tone so much! I rotate between this and my beloved Luna Oil.

Merit makeup | I’d been wanting to try a cream based makeup routine and liked that Merit had cleaner ingredients, but I was impressed by how smoothly it glides on and how glowy it makes my skin look. I got the Minimalist (complexion corrector) in Bisque, Flush Balm (blush) in both Stockholm and Beverly Hills, Day Glow (highlighter) in Cava, Bronze Balm in Clay, Tinted Lip Oil in both Au Naturel and Jeté, and their brush. I wouldn’t put it in the longwear category, but for a daytime routine that looks incredible natural or a glowy, pigmented nighttime look, it’s worth a try!

THE tortoise sunglasses | These are all over Instagram but dangit, they’re a classic look and for $30, feel really nice. I got rid of every pair of sunglasses I owned except these and my favorite aviators from two years ago – they’re all I wear!

HOME

Let’s Love to Cook | I could not stop talking about Larson’s resources all year long because they truly have changed my life. Sounds dramatic but really, using her cookbooks has helped me to ENJOY cooking with confidence and not be intimidated by the process of making from-scratch, hearty, healthy meals for my family. Cooking with my kids became a regular thing in 2023 thanks to LLTC. And the pre-made meal plans and grocery lists are just a no-brainer. Can’t say enough good things!

Silpat reusable baking sheet | Eliminates the need for cooking spray, parchment paper, etc. With all the things I’ve been making and baking (see above) this was a must.

Label maker | A tiny but mighty winner for my home organization efforts in 2023. Works with an easy-to-use phone app.

Locket frame | As soon as I opened this frame, I immediately bought another one for another room. Gorgeous! Comes in antique gold too if that’s more your vibe.

KIDS

Karaoke set | This thing is so fun! Has bluetooth so you can play any song from your phone, and it’ll turn down the artist’s voice so you can sing karaoke, or you can just play it like normal and sing along (comes with 2 mics). Our kids have loved it but it would make an awesome gift for any age or great to have if you’re throwing a party.

Tangle teezer brush | So good I bought two to have on hand. Frizzy + fine little girl hair has met its match.

Personalized dry erase board | I bet Steele wrote her name 487 times this past year thanks to this. Bought a few for gifting, too!

Raising Emotionally Strong Boys | One I’ll read again and again as the boys get older. So much wisdom and practical advice for all age groups (lots of validation and answers for moms of toddlers) but especially relevant for mamas of elementary-age boys. I really enjoyed this one.

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Still loving everything on my 2022 list, too – there’s some good ones on there. I’d love to hear if you have any of these and love them as much as I do!

Brothers Turn Two | Little Blue Truck Birthday Party

Another year, another book-themed birthday party for our boys. Last year, it was one of my favorites – this year, it was theirs! They’d been requesting to read every book from the Little Blue Truck series (we now own all of them) so much throughout the summer that we had to put them away for awhile (IYKYK). But when it was time to start planning, I knew they’d love a Little Blue Truck theme and knew it would be an easy one to DIY!

You can shop everything from this Little Blue Truck party all in one place HERE on LTK.

I found the sweetest watercolor Little Blue Truck invitation template on Etsy, along with matching milestone posters that I thought would be cute to hang and let guests read a little spotlight on each of our boys. Both templates were super easy to edit online and I had everything printed at Office Depot. Click below to shop Little Blue Truck party invitations and designs!

I’m a sucker for some punny party food labels, so for our Little Blue Truck themed party food, we served:
–Cow patties (chocolate cookies)
–Truck tires (Oreos)
–Hay bales (Rice Krispie treats)
–Chicken feed (Chex mix)
–Pitchforks & shovels (forks & spoons)
–Fresh produce (fruit tray and burger fixin’s)
and a fillin’ station (drinks).

I saw the dump truck full of chips idea on Pinterest – a little sticky tack rolled up in a ball held the bin at just the right angle and voila! And if you’re wondering why the dump truck – there’s a very grumpy dump truck that Little Blue Truck ends up befriending in the original story.

We ordered a lemon blueberry cake from a local baker (my husband’s idea – he said “lemon blue” for “Little Blue” just made sense lol) and I had her keep it simple on top so I could use a few of our farm animal toys as cake toppers. I love how it turned out!

The big hit of the party was a surprise we saved for after burgers and cake – our guest of honor! I thought it would be a long shot to find someone local with an old blue truck they’d be willing to bring over for the party, but knew if anyone had the connections to make it happen, it’d be my father-in-law. Sure enough, he knows a classic car enthusiast with the perfect “little blue truck” who was more than willing to drive it over from the next town for us for the afternoon. So kind of them.

The boys were starstruck – Shep was nervous to sit inside but Hayes was SO pumped. They got to go for a ride around the culdesac in the truck bed and “drive” in the driveway and had the biggest time. The adults enjoyed checking out the ‘58 Chevy, too!

Felt like this was a little glimpse into my future – I’ll need every bit of the 14 more years before they’re actually driving to mentally prepare!

Their personalized Little Blue Truck shirts were another Etsy find – the seller was so great to work with and I was really impressed with the quality of the design and the screen printing. I love that they’re not necessarily “birthday” shirts, and I sized up, so they’ll be able to wear them quite a bit! They also got these Little Blue Truck pajamas – such a hit.

Such a sweet day celebrating our big two-year-olds with family and friends. Time sure has flown with these boys and the days only get more fun! We love you, brothers!

My Deep Cleaning Rotation

Keeping things organized is just part of my nature. Always has been. Keeping things clean… not so much. I’ve never cared as much about cleanliness as I have about edited and simplified spaces, but as a mom with three little ones and a big dog running around creating messes all day long, clean is a higher priority now.

Of course we have our daily cleaning routines — running the dishwasher, doing a load of laundry, sweeping, wiping down surfaces. Other tasks I’ll do as needed - vacuuming, cleaning toilets, etc. But when it’s time for a deep clean – when I want things to feel CLEAN clean, I’ll set aside a bigger chunk of time. I’d rather clean a space from top to bottom all the way than doing a little bit here and there.

I was inspired by Francie Outlaw to create a set of deep cleaning lists for our home. When she first shared hers, admittedly, I didn’t get the hype. I thought “Who needs a checklist for cleaning? Just clean!” But the more she shared them, I got on board and appreciated having a checklist for each area of our home to make sure I’m really being thorough and not forgetting anything.

While she has physical notecards, I realized I prefer the lists as a Note/checklist on my phone, so I can mark things off as I go, easily add a notation for when that particular deep clean was last done, and I don’t have to worry about cards getting dirty. Plus, I can edit the lists as needed, as our kids grow and things look different, and as the items in our home change. So far it’s worked great!

For my lists, I grouped certain spaces if it made sense to knock them out together. From start to finish, each area takes about 1-2 hours and I’ll complete them as needed. I’ve made it a goal to get through the entire list a few times a year: early summer, pre-holidays, and hopefully once more. Feel free to copy these lists and tweak to make your own set!

MASTER BATH

• clean sink + bar keepers friend

• clean window + lights + mirror + decor

• clean shower

• clean toilet

• disinfect tub

• disinfect counters 

• wipe down cabinets

• wipe out drawers

• baseboards

• empty trash + clean trash can

• sweep + mop

• wash bath mat

• wash linens

• refill soap

• inventory

MASTER BEDROOM + CLOSET

• wash sheets + pillowcases + duvet cover

• all dirty clothes in hampers

• dust furniture + fan + shoe shelves

• wipe down decor + TV + mirror

• clean windows

• clean under furniture

• vacuum curtains

• baseboards

• tidy dresser + nightstand drawers

• make bed

• sweep + mop

LAUNDRY ROOM + HALF BATH

• dust shelf + decor

• tidy cabinets + inventory

• wipe down washer + dryer

• clean inside washer + lint trap

• clean window

• clean toilet + stool

• clean sink + bar keepers friend

• refill soap

• wipe counters + decor + mirror

• baseboards

• empty trash

• sweep + mop

• iron clothes

KITCHEN + DINING

• clean appliances inside + out

• purge + wipe out fridge

• dust all lights

• clean + disinfect sink

• soak silverware

• wipe down coffee area + refill machine

• refill canisters

• refill soaps + clean soap dispenser

• refill centerpiece candles

• clean windows + blinds

• clean trashcans

• wipe out drawers + cabinets

• wipe down cabinets + backsplash

• tidy + disinfect countertops

• wipe down table, chairs, buffet + decor

• disinfect booster seats

• wipe pantry shelves + inventory

• wash linens

• baseboards

• sweep + mop

LIVING ROOM + Stairs

• tidy + rotate toys

• wash pillow covers + blankets

• wipe down coffee table

• dust lamp, decor, mantle, tv

• wipe down picture frames

• clean + vacuum out fireplace

• clean windows + blinds

• vacuum curtains

• vacuum couch + under cushions

• clean + sweep under couches

• sweep stairs

• sweep coat closet, tidy + wipe down shelves

• baseboards

• sweep + vacuum + mop floors

• wash Ruggable

KIDS’ ROOMS

• wash linens + make beds

• tidy bookshelves + baskets

• dust furniture + decor

• dust fans + lights

• clean under furniture

• tidy closets + dust shelves

• baseboards

• vacuum drapes

• clean windows + blinds

• vacuum floors

• empty + clean vacuum

UPSTAIRS BATH + HALL

• sweep upstairs hallway

• dust hallway frames + windowsill 

• clean sink + bar keepers friend

• disinfect bathtub + tidy toys

• disinfect non-slip mat in tub

• clean toilet

• dust lights

• wipe down counters, mirror, decor

• wipe cabinets

• wipe out drawers

• refill soap

• baseboards

• empty trash

• vacuum rug

• sweep + mop

• wash linens

• inventory

GARAGE

• tidy toys

• rotate seasonal things to/from attic

• tidy + wipe down counters + cabinets

• wipe down workout bench

• wipe freezer + fridge inside and out

• put donations in car

• break down boxes + take out trash

• inventory

• sweep floors

OUTSIDE

• leaf blow

• pick up dog poop

• wipe down chairs

• clean windows

• clean grill

• shake out and sweep around door mats

• sweep porch + patio

• sweep doorframes + cobwebs

• clean dog bowls

• disinfect patio table

• wipe down tv

• water plants

A quick note on cleaning products — at the beginning of 2024, I started fresh with all new cleaning products. We now use Branch Basics for everyday cleaning, wiping surfaces, etc., and Force of Nature as our disinfectant. Both are completely non-toxic and fragrance-free, and I’ve been so impressed with their effectiveness. The Force of Nature link above will get you 40% off and earns me extra capsules for sharing. I recommend the Year’s Supply — it’s a really great value and should last you closer to 2 years or more!

Hopefully this was helpful to you, even just to articulate what exactly it takes do a true reset in each area of your home when it comes to cleaning. Whether you’re frequently hosting or in the thick of motherhood with young kids, it feels good to know that even as the daily messes pile up, your home functions at a baseline of cleanliness, with an extra fresh slate when you need it.

How I Manage + Organize My Digital and iPhone Photos

Consider this a sequel to my post on Living with Less and Prioritizing Simplicity in our Home. This time, we’re talking all things digital photos! After doing a giant organizational overhaul of our home and the things in it over the last couple of years, I still felt like I didn’t have a handle on our personal photos. I’ve always kept my clients’ photos organized, with systems in place for culling, storing, and backing up securely, but I couldn’t say the same for my personal photos. The number of Recents just sitting on my phone was in the thousands, and I know I’m not alone there.

As a photographer, of course I value professional photos. They’re artful, intentional, and they help me to remember certain seasons in a really beautiful light. I like to record things for our family with my big camera, too. But iPhone photos can be just as important - the little day to day moments, the funny videos, the vacation memories. They all hold extreme value.

Just like I prefaced the first blog, let me say again – a lot of this might sound harsh or extreme. It’s taken some perspective shifts and lightbulb moments to change some hard-wired habits and ways of thinking. Just like clothes and belongings, I get the attachment to photos and the anxiety/worry/guilt that comes with trying to pare them down. I get it. Your memories are yours alone and what’s important to you is important to you for a reason. So again, this is what’s currently working for me. If something’s helpful to you, great! If not, keep on keepin on.

The WHY Behind My Digital Photo Overhaul

It’s funny to look back and think about our own childhood photos. My mom was great at keeping photo albums and I loved flipping through them, but those albums held dozens, maybe a hundred. Certainly not thousands upon thousands of photos.

Now, we (80s and 90s babies) are parents to the most photographed generation in history. But what purpose is that actually serving? At what point does the sheer number of photos outweigh the benefit of keeping them all? Snapping photos has become almost a comfort thing for us in some ways. We think I HAVE TO CAPTURE THIS RIGHT NOW OR I’LL REGRET IT, instead of allowing ourselves to be fully present and then letting the moment pass on by. But do we lose some of the meaning, the intention, the value of a memory captured if it’s just floating around in a sea of tens of thousands of other memories captured? It sure becomes harder for memories to stand out and be appreciated…

I think some of us are scarred by the lack of tangible memories and sad that we don’t have more pictures from our own childhood. Which is understandable. But the challenge is this: you don’t have to overcompensate for that when it comes to your kids. I actually kind of appreciate the 90s way of NOT having every single little moment captured and saved. There’s gotta be a happy medium that exists between a lack of childhood memories captured on camera, and way too freaking many.

The number of photos on your phone is only going to increase. If your kids are little and it’s already at 5,000, 10,000, 20,000 - what’s it going to be at when they’re in high school? And beyond that? There is no physical way we can go back through and enjoy and relive 100,000, 500,000, a million photos some day down the road. It’s just not feasible. Even if we just wanted to look through a few at a time, or refer back to a certain memory, or photos from a certain season or event, how is that going to work if our photos aren’t organized? Are we going to just hope our iPhones still function the same and we can scroll back through 15 years’ worth of photos? That is a lot of scrolling.

I look at this as doing my future self and my children a favor. Not burdening them with more than they could ever possibly go through. Keeping only the best of the best. Keeping things manageable, for their sake. There’s a fine line between a lot to appreciate, and just plain overwhelming. Just like I’m not going to burden my kids with storage units worth of physical items to sort through one day, I’m not going to burden them with hundreds of thousands of photos, either.

the hardest part: culling

I’ve tried to make a habit of deleting iPhone photos as I go, culling through them daily or just right after I take a bunch. I also LOVE the strategy of using the search feature in the Photos app to search for the current date (ex. July 25) – it will show you every photo and video you’ve ever taken on July 25th of any year. Look through them, smile at some memories you forgot you captured, quickly decide which few are worth keeping, repeat. Doing a nightly cull is a good starting point for going back through and narrowing down/deleting photos from throughout the years, until you’re more caught up.

What does this look like? Blurry, awkward faces, closed eyes – gone. I don’t need 12 pictures if they all have a very similar pose or facial expression. If there are multiple people in a photo from a given event, one or two of that grouping is plenty. If I’m keeping a photo, there needs to be something distinctive about it. A good example every mom can relate to – taking the monthly pictures of your infant. Did you not take 27 pictures of them with the “4 months” sign? And 85 pictures with the “11 months” sign because they were rolling over or crawling off in half of them? I’d go back through those types of “bursts” of photos and narrow it down to literally just one or two (the horror, I know – but you can do this!). If it’s scenery, same thing. I don’t need 3 pictures of the same sunset or skyline, beautiful as it may be.

Distinctive is the keyword. Distinct poses, scenes, angles, facial expressions, actions being captured. 90s mindset. I try to think about it from a photographer’s perspective – the client only knows and cares about the photos you deliver, not the ones you delete. Your kids one day will not know or care about the okay photos you deleted – they’ll be able to better appreciate the good ones you kept.

It might take months on the front end to get things culled and at a more manageable number, but imagine the weight that’ll lift! Make a goal to have your number cut by a certain percentage by a certain date – a third by Christmas? Half by this time next year? And you’ll get to relive some memories as you go. Culling is the most time-intensive part. Beyond that, getting photos and videos off your phone and into folders every couple of months. once you’re caught up, takes minimal effort and time. 

off the phone, onto the external hard drive

A big influence for me in all of this is Nancy Ray – I listen to her podcast pretty often and have always heard her talk about her Legacy Photo System. She’s a former wedding photographer as well and has created an entire course about managing and organizing your family’s photos – your legacy! In her words, “Your phone is a phone. Not a storage device.” Phones get lost. They break. Did you know iCloud only syncs — it doesn’t actually create a backup? If someone gets ahold of your phone and wipes it clean, guess what - your photos are gone forever. Do you really want to trust these memories to iCloud alone? Bottom line: when photos and videos are only on your phone, they’re not permanent.

To get them off my phone and stored safely, I use two hard drives: my main external hard drive, and a backup hard drive. I store very little on my actual computer because I don’t want it to get bogged down and run slower, so all of my client photos (and now personal photos too) are on an external hard drive. My backup hard drive’s only function is to create an exact copy of my external hard drive.

So to get photos and videos off my phone, I use Image Capture (standard on Mac) or even just AirDrop. From there, I drag and drop into folders on my external. Each folder name starts with the year, then the month, then the event name. If there are multiple images from a particular event, that gets its own folder. Random one-off photos and videos can go in a seasonal folder, like 2023 Spring, 2023 Summer, etc. Here are some examples:

For something that spans multiple months (like Pregnancy – I wanted to keep all my ultrasound + bump pictures in one folder) I name the folder with whatever month it started.

After culling a tonnnnn of my kids’ baby pictures, I found it was easiest to group what was left, just day-to-day moments that don’t really fall under an event, into six-month increments: 0-6, 6-12, 12-18, 18-24 months. Beyond that, I do (Name) 2 Years Old, (Name) 3 Years Old, etc., for the miscellaneous photos and videos. For random family photos, scenery, a picture from a random date night, things like that, I do seasonal folders for each year - Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter.

Phone Settings

I realized as I started transferring photos to my hard drive that having Live Photo turned on was creating more work in the long run for me, so I turned it off – controversial, I know. Yes, it’s fun to watch Lives back, but when you import a Live Photo, it automatically creates a photo AND video version of the file and that’s just not worth the extra culling effort or file space for me. I tend to use Portrait Mode most of the time anyway.

Also, after realizing my iPhone photos were importing as HEIC files vs. JPEG, I did some research on what’s best. HEIC files retain the same quality at about half the file size of JPEG, and both types can be edited in Lightroom. However, after running into compatibility issues with printing companies and album software, converting HEICs to JPEGs became too much of a hassle, so JPEG it is for me.

Backing up my photos securely

Getting a quality external hard drive is important, but even the sturdiest external drive isn’t made to last forever. From personal experience and hearing from other photographers, it seems like 5-ish years is a normal life expectancy for these things. Which means having your photos backed up in multiple places is IMPORTANT.

My backup hard drive runs with Time Machine to create a copy of what’s on my external, and I keep it in our fire-proof safe when it’s not plugged in. On my phone, I have the Amazon Photos app, which constantly backs up new photos (not videos, but if you have Prime, it’s free to back up unlimited photos, so it’s silly not to take advantage.)

Beyond that, I knew it was worth paying for some sort of reliable cloud storage to protect these memories – as dramatic as it sounds, it’s our family’s legacy at stake. Like I mentioned before— iCloud doesn’t actually back up an extra copy of your photos, it only syncs what’s currently on your phone (so if your phone is stolen and photos get deleted, they’re gone for good) SCARY. Dropbox is a good alternative and is what Nancy Ray uses - its base plan is $119 a year for 2TB, but I didn’t need quite that much space. I have about 8,000 total photos and videos right now (1200 of those are our wedding photos) for a total of 98GB. Google One (what they now call all your storage across Gmail, Google Drive, Google Photos, etc.) has a 200GB option for $29 a year, which is perfect for me. To be honest, I hate the Google Photos interface BUT, I love the rest of the Google Suite’s integration enough to make up for it, and I like how Google Drive allows you to copy entire folders over from your computer and it keeps the same hierarchy. So Google Drive is where my photos are currently residing on the cloud!

But what about…

Accessibility? Does it bother you not being able to look at old photos on your phone?

Nope! Not an issue, because I still can! I’ll keep the current calendar year’s worth of photos and videos in my Recents folder on my phone, and if I want to look back at something else, I can easily find it on my Google Drive app. It’s all still there, organized into folders just like on my hard drive, it’s just not taking up storage space on my phone itself.

What about things like screenshots, quotes, recipes, etc.?

I did create a folder for those things within each year, however – screenshots are usually something I need to do something about. So as I’m culling, if it’s important enough to hang onto, I’ll either write it down on paper, copy it into my Notes app, email it to myself and file it within Gmail, or move that to-do item elsewhere.

How do you reconcile all this as a photographer? Don’t photographers advocate for MORE photos?

Obviously I’m a proponent of investing in professional photos for your family on a regular basis. There’s so much value in hiring someone to capture your entire family in an artful, timeless way. That said – it will always and forever be quality over quantity for me. It’s okay to only keep your very favorites from professional photo sessions. We cull your photos before we edit and deliver them to you - you’re allowed to cull even more! It’s our job to give you a gallery of what we feel is artful and beautiful. We’re providing you with options, and our goal for you is to really, truly enjoy your favorites. Maybe it’s the whole gallery! Maybe it’s half of them. Just like you do with your iPhone photos, decide which ones are most meaningful for you and your family’s legacy. Go for the ones that immediately make you feel something. Print them, frame them, put them in an album or family yearbook. It’s okay if you don’t hang onto the rest. 

My Goals from Here on Out

I’m planning to sit down and transfer photos from my phone to my computer once a month or as needed. Now that I’m caught up and culling daily, it’s really not too daunting of a task anymore to stay current.

A couple of years ago, before I even started this whole process, I started adding photos to Family Yearbook folders on my desktop. Like, the best of the best. Probably around 150-200 photos per year. I also created a Shared Album on my phone so my husband and I can both add our favorite iPhone photos that we want included in these yearbooks. At the end of this year, I finally got caught up creating those annual yearbooks for our family using mPix hardcover books. After trying out a few different options, I loved mPix’s customization features the best, but there are tons of great album companies depending on your preferences. Even an old school photo album with 4x6s of your iPhone photos is a great option! No matter what you choose, having your photos printed for your family to look back on and hold in their hands – there’s nothing better.

Something Andrew requested was a yearly family video, too. I finally caught up on 5 years’ worth of annual videos with iMovie and it was actually way easier than I expected! I just drag and drop my favorite video files and it can compile everything, in chronological order, into one continuous file. Nothing fancy, just all our favorite clips from the year combined into one long one, but so fun to look back on!

I also got archival storage boxes for our loose printed photos that aren’t in frames – one for our life pre-kids (dating/engagement/wedding/newlywed years) and one for our family memories.

Final thoughts

Just like with our home and downsizing our belongings, the mental load of managing all of it gets HEAVY. Getting to this point in downsizing our photos feels like a giant weight has been lifted. I feel like I can be much more present, enjoying the moments with my kids rather than having my phone in their face all the time. For the really important things (big life events, milestones, vacations, gatherings) I bring my big camera and leave my phone put away as much as possible, but when I do go to pull up the camera on my phone, I try to ask myself now “Am I taking this to share? Or am I taking it for us, to save?” It’s ok to take things for the purpose of sharing sometimes – we live in a connected world – but if it’s just for me and my family, I’m sure going to be more intentional about taking fewer but better photos. Quality over quantity.

Less, but better. That’s what I’m going for in all aspects of life in this season and it. is. freeing.

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Thank you Maddie Ray for some of my very favorite family photos.

Silhouettes

This past January, something urged me to open and read a newsletter email I usually just skim over. The DIY silhouette lesson wasn’t even the point of the email, it was just a bonus link, but I was intrigued and wanted to try with my own kids, not having very high expectations, but I am in LOVE with how these turned out!

These will be treasured for decades to come and I’m so grateful I got to do these for so many friends and past clients, too.

Something about your babies’ precious profiles frozen in time — bittersweet because it’s undeniably them, yet they won’t ever be this little again. Their nose, lips, cowlicks and curls — their disposition and demeanor — the essence of who they are, right here at this moment in time. A silhouette presses pause and helps you take it all in.

Our Favorite Baby and Toddler Board Books

For Christmas this year, as a way to help curb the influx of STUFF that inevitably accompanies the holidays, I’m sticking to the “Want Wear Need Read” idea for gifts within our immediate family. Something you want, something you’ll wear, something you need, and something to read. So I’m on the hunt for a few new books to add to our collection - board books, preferably, for obvious reasons (#toddlers) - and thought I’d share which ones we’ve loved in case you’re looking, too. These are our tried and true favorites for ages 0-3!

I left out the classics here that most of us have on our bookshelves already - the ones we all know and love. The ones below are some I’d never heard of before we entered the baby years. These win our vote for best board books for babies and toddlers. Are there any we missed? Let me know in the comments!

Animal Board Books for Babies

Some of our very favorite bedtime stories right here. The three on the top shelf are just beautiful - the words, the illustrations, everything. The ones on the bottom shelf are sweet and silly and always get some giggles. We love the lessons in Llama Llama, too!

Our Favorite Baby and Toddler Book Series

Our babies go wild for the “You’re My Little” books - I think we have 4 or 5 more of them not pictured and we’ve read them constantly since Steele was tiny. They’re precious! Short and sweet. We’ve loved collecting them as new ones and holiday editions come out.

The Little Blue Truck books are so well done. The way the words flow, the illustrations, the life lessons toddlers can understand, the humor – they’re wonderful!

Construction and Farm Board Books

It wouldn’t be a baby boy bookshelf without some construction books, and these three are my top faves. All of them are rhyming and are so fun to read - Busy Builders introducing days of the week is a bonus! For our top farm books, Goodnight Tractor is imaginative and adorable, and we love lifting the flaps to say goodnight to alllllll the farm animals in Night Night Farm.

Christmas Books for Babies and Toddlers

Of all the Christmas books we have for the kids, I’d say these three have been read the most. The top two are pretty simple, nothing deep, but super cute. God Gave Us Christmas explains the meaning of the holiday so well in a captivating way for toddlers. We have several in the God Gave Us series - one about Easter, one about new siblings (God Gave Us Two) – they’re longer reads but so beautifully done.

Baby Books About Family

Thank You God for Mommy and Daddy are fun reads but I also appreciate how they have subtle nods to the ways God designed moms and dads differently - nurturing, caretaking, protecting, providing, etc. The ABCs of Kindness is one of Steele’s favorites and a great way to introduce concepts like inclusion and forgiveness. And A Twin Is to Hug is a MUST for any twin moms out there. The sweetest book about the uniqueness and the bond twins share and it makes me smile every time!

Christian Board Books for Babies and Toddlers

I absolutely LOVE the Little Hearts book series. They’re so fun to read together but also a great way to introduce overarching Bible themes along with colors, numbers, letters and animals. Can’t recommend these enough!

Sweeter Than the Sweetest Honey helps toddlers understand what the Bible is and why we read it – the truths in this one are spot on and presented so well. The first time I read When I Pray for You to Steele, I had giant tears flowing down my cheeks by the end of it, and it still gets me choked up every time. SO, so good.

Best Books to Give as a Baby Shower Gift

If I were headed to a baby shower soon, I would order a copy of both of these to give to a new mama. Of all the ones on our shelves, these stand out to me as ones worthy of gifting. They’re not super well known, so you don’t run the risk of duplicates, and my gosh, they are just the most beautifully written books that parents, babies and toddlers alike will all enjoy.

When I helped host a friend’s shower this spring, we had a copy of I Promise You out on a table with a sharpie for people to leave notes in and sign – it has quite a bit of white space on each page so it’s perfect for that! Having a book for attendees to sign at baby showers and first birthday parties is one of my favorite hosting tips. My baby shower hostesses did it for me and still to this day I love reading it to the kids and seeing what each person wrote. Such a special way to do a guest book that doubles as a keepsake.

Hope this list helps you find some new reads the whole family will love!

Brunch with the Brother Bears | Brown Bear Themed First Birthday Party

We’ve called Hayes and Shep our “brother bears” from the very beginning and since Brown Bear, Brown Bear is one of our favorite books to read, I knew from the time they were tiny I wanted a bear-themed first birthday party with the Eric Carle bear. A big brunch for our sweet twin boys, with friends and family who came from all over to celebrate with us made for a pretty unbeatable morning!

Here’s a roundup of what we served for our Brown Bear Brunch - scroll for details and recipes below.

FOOD
Waffle + pancake bar with toppings
Chicken + waffles with Chick Fil A nuggets
Fruit salad
Sausage balls
Teddy trail mix
Custom cookies
Birthday cake + smash cakes

DRINKS
Beary Sweet Lemonade in honey bear cups for the kids
Mama Bear Mimosas + juice bar
Bear’s Bubbly - apple cinnamon champagne cocktail
Honey Bear - bourbon citrus sage cocktail

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Brown Bear Birthday Party Ideas

I wanted a fun drink for the kids served in honey bear cups and found a few recipes for honey-sweetened strawberry lemonade that I combined into this one. I’d never made simple syrup before but it really was simple! You can make it a few hours ahead of time or the day before and let it chill in the fridge.

Beary Sweet Lemonade - makes 16 honey bear cups
3/4 cup water
3/4 cup honey
1 tablespoon brown sugar
4-5 sliced strawberries
Simply Lemonade

Bring the water, honey, sugar and strawberries to a boil, turn down and let simmer for a few minutes until berries soften, then strain the berries and let the syrup cool in a mason jar. The morning of the party I poured the syrup into all the honey bears (just eyeballed it), filled up the rest of the cups with Simply Lemonade and popped in a kraft paper straw. So yummy and they were a big hit with the kids!

Having a book for guests to sign is a cute way to incorporate a keepsake at baby showers or birthday parties. It’s so fun to read back with your kiddos later and remember who came to celebrate!

I wanted a welcome poster to carry the theme through the main table area. Office Depot will print posters (1-2 day turnaround if you pick up in store) for about $15, depending on size. I had all of our food labels, banner letters and signage printed on cardstock at Office Depot too and picked them up with the poster. So handy!

Morgan of Cowtown Cookie Co. in Fort Worth made the cookies for Steele’s first birthday and I knew I wanted her cookies for the boys’ first birthday, too. I told her the theme and the font I’d used on the invites and she went to work. She is just so talented!

Teddy Trail Mix Recipe

-Pretzel snaps
-Honeycomb cereal
-Teddy Grahams
-Mini marshmallows
-Butterscotch chips
Combine in amounts to your liking and mix well.

The waffle + pancake bar was such a fun way to serve brunch to a house full of people. We had about 35 guests, and I was worried about getting enough waffles toasted in time/keeping them warm, but we borrowed a second toaster from a friend, toasted 4 at a time that morning and kept them warm in the oven until right before serving time. For the pancakes, we just did oven-bake mini pancakes. We had 2 boxes of 24 buttermilk waffles + 1 big box of mini pancakes and had more than enough to go around. It all turned out great!

Waffle Bar Topping Ideas

• chopped fruit (bananas, strawberries, blueberries, raspberries)

• cinnamon

• peanut butter

• chocolate syrup

• caramel syrup

• regular syrup + butter

• Nutella

• Reddi Whip

• ricotta or whipped cream cheese

• mini chocolate chips

• butterscotch chips

• mini marshmallows

• sprinkles

• bacon crumbles

We also had a big fruit salad and sausage balls, along with “chicken and waffles” - mini waffles and Chick Fil A nuggets on a toothpick - these were gone in about 5 minutes! I probably should’ve gotten the medium size nugget tray instead of small (120 vs 64), and you could really do 1 mini waffle per nugget instead of 2. Lots of guests put nuggets on their big waffles too, so you could even forego the mini waffles and just have the nuggets as a topping option for your waffle bar.

When I was searching for bear-themed beverages, I came across this bourbon drink called the Honey Bear - it’s sweetened with oranges and a honey/sage leaf simple syrup. I tweaked/simplified a few different recipes to come up with our own version and it was DIVINE.

Honey Bear Citrus Sage Simple Syrup

makes enough for 16-20 servings
-1 cup water
-1 cup honey
-1 tablespoon brown sugar
-half an orange, squeezed
-10-12 sage leaves

Combine all ingredients, bring to a boil, turn down and let simmer for a few minutes until honey and sugar are dissolved. Strain and store liquid in a mason jar to cool.

These you can’t really make ahead of time, so I put the syrup in a honey bear cup, wrote the recipe out on a card and let people make their own.

Honey Bear Bourbon Cocktail Recipe

2 oz bourbon over ice
1 oz simple syrup
Stir well, add orange peel and sage leaf for garnish.

Bear’s Bubbly has been a favorite of ours since we had it at our friends’ wedding - it was their signature cocktail named after their dog, Bear, and lemme tell you, you’re gonna want to be drinking this all fall and winter long. The amounts/ratios of the recipe are really up to you (we made a big batch in a pitcher for the party), but it’s pretty hard to mess up - any way you do it, it’s freaking delicious.

Bear’s Bubbly recipe | Champagne-Fireball-Cider Cocktail for fall

-large bottle of Fireball
-bottle of champagne
-jug of apple cider
Mix all in equal parts - add more cider if it’s too strong. Garnish with a rosemary sprig.

I wanted plenty of drink options, so we also had a “Mama Bear Mimosa” bar with Simply Strawberry, Simply Blueberry, Simply Peach, champagne and mint leaves for everyone to make their own mimosas or to just grab some juice!

My sweet Hayes and Shep digging into their smash cakes - they were obsessed! I went the easy route for these and bought ready-made cake slices for $2.98 from the cold section of the store bakery. Cut into a circle shape, cover with more white icing and voila!

The banner and the high chair garlands were both DIYs using this TISSUE PAPER TASSEL TUTORIAL which could not have been easier. You only need one sheet of tissue paper to make each tassel, so 3-4 colors, 1 pack each, was more than enough for this banner and the 2 high chair garlands.

We feasted and cheers’d and celebrated a huge milestone with our baby boys and my heart was so happy all day long. Happy first birthday, sweet brother bears!

Living with Less and Prioritizing Simplicity in Our Home

It’s been a big year around here! As we’re approaching the boys’ first birthday, I’ve been thinking about how we’ve adapted to life with 3 under 3 - shifts we’ve had to make in our routines, our perspectives and our home.

One recurrent theme from this year has been SIMPLIFYING - born out of necessity but then very much an intentional shift. Three littles comes with a LOT of stimulation all day long and requires so incredibly much of my energy, both mental and physical. I could not afford, time-wise or mental health-wise, to also be stressed out by clutter and disorganization in our home, and I’ve really done an overhaul on not just the things we own, but the way I view them.

The goal has never been minimalism. I don’t desire to live with as little as possible. I do desire to only have things in our home that I love and that serve a purpose though, and I’m keenly aware now that every single thing that makes its way into our home 1) is the product of a decision and 2) requires ongoing mental energy. Maintaining it, cleaning it, storing it, inventory - the more you have, the more that effort multiplies.

Mental Prep Work Before Starting to Simplify

Probably important to mention that by nature, I don’t have sentimental attachment to very many things - maybe to a fault. I’ve always been pretty minimal too when it comes to products (makeup/skin/hair etc.) - I know what I like and I stick to it. I don’t have workwear for an office job. And I’ve never been into holiday decorating - outside of our Christmas tree and stockings, our home decor doesn’t change from season to season. These factors alone helped give me a head start on downsizing.

So let me preface all of this with the classic - “you do you.” Let your home reflect your life and the things you love. This is what has worked for us and the methods I’ve personally used to bring more peace, calm, and TIME back to my life in the midst of a very chaotic season. A lot of it probably sounds harsh or extreme, and it is! I had to do some major perspective shifts to get the ball rolling and let go of certain things, literally and figuratively. These were the big ones:

• Certain things serve a purpose for a season. We get to decide when that season is over.

• Not seeing things as what you paid for them. It can be hard to look at something and not see dollar signs, but sometimes you just have to chalk it up to paying for a lesson learned.

• Is it a likely what if? Or an unlikely what if. If keeping something hinges on a what-if, assess the probability. Is the risk really worth the keep?

• Letting go of guilt and feelings of obligation. Once an item enters your home and your possession - you and you alone are in charge of what happens to it.

• Self respect. Say it with me: “I owe myself the respect of not settling.” Things you wear, use, give your energy to… if you look at something and feel hesitation, there’s a reason. And you don’t have to justify that reason to anyone else.

Live Simply by Annie has really insightful, helpful tips (and tough love/hard truths) for working through these things, getting over the hump and letting go of the fear, obligation, and guilt we associate with certain belongings. It’s an ongoing process for me and she’s been a great resource!

Focus Areas for Simplifying Our Home

EXPIRED. Anything expired = gone immediately. Food, medicine, beauty products, cleaning products. The easiest places to start! 

EXTRAS. What are all these extras actually for? What purpose are they serving? 

-Extra towels (not designated guest towels, but extra towels in general). Why? I have one set of favorite towels and a few other sets that sat in the cabinet for 7 years. I held onto them because I thought, “We registered for these. They’re nice. We might use them someday.” Except we really haven’t. I’d always just rather have my favorite set out. If you wash/dry your towels and hang them right back up, what are the extras for? Goes for sheets too.

Everyday use. Fancy. Guest. Fancy Guest. Uhhh - eleven?!

-Dish towels. Hand towels. Beach towels. Kids’ towels. Washcloths. All. the. towels. Keep the ones you really love. Save a few old ones for big spills and messes. Let go of the rest.

-Tote bags. Travel bags. All the bags. Pare it down. 

-Kitchen stuff. Duplicates, damaged, dingy… get rid of or replace.

-Extra cups. Water bottles. Yetis. Mugs. Koozies. Sippy cups. Kid plates. Toddler utensils. Bibs. Oven mitts. It was out of control, and we reach for the same ones over and over anyway. I edited these things ruthlessly. 

-Extras in the junk drawer. You know.

-Manuals. If you’ve ever had an issue with something, do you really go find the manual? Or do you consult Google or YouTube?

VISUAL CLUTTER

We’re working with about 1600 square feet for 5 people and a big dog, and as a mostly-stay-at-home mom, I spend a LOT of time in this house. In order for it not to feel cramped or for me not to go stir crazy, I’ve learned to appreciate decorating with WAYYY less and reducing the visual clutter on walls, shelves, tabletops, etc. We don’t have a lot of trinkets out or little things displayed - less to look at means less to think about + less to keep clean and right now, that’s where I want to be.

One thing I’ve reminded myself over the years as we’ve lived in and decorated a few homes is that not every wall or surface needs something. Don’t settle and buy something just to fill the space. Wait for something you truly love, or decide that it’s fine without anything at all.

TIP — I think a big contributing factor when there’s a cluttered feeling with decor is the scale. It’s hard to go too big. It’s easy to go too small, and then feel like you need more to visually fill the space - whether that’s on a wall, shelf, or table. Art and framed photos, especially. I’ve trained my brain to think “less, but bigger.”

TOY ROTATION

We started a toy rotation system last fall to keep the living room toy situation manageable since we don’t have a playroom. Three baskets total downstairs - Steele’s toys and books on the stair landing (behind the baby gate so brothers stay out of her stuff) and the boys’ toys by the sofa. The rest of their toys stay out of sight, out of mind in clear storage drawers in their closet upstairs, and I rotate things every couple of weeks. It’s a win all the way around! More focused play, less decision overload, easy clean up. Plus when I rotate different toys and books in, they get excited about them all over again. I try to limit things with lots of pieces to a few at a time downstairs, and we pick up once before nap time, once before bed. It’s worth it to me to spend a few minutes a few times a day to have a more peaceful space, and it makes the end of the day pickup more manageable.

WARDROBE

We’ve all done the closet clean out that feels productive for a while, but then you’re still finding shirts you bought in college and jeans you wore 2 pregnancies ago you just can’t seem to part with. I was determined this time to not just make a dent, but pare things down to the point of almost starting over — focusing on quality over quantity and rebuilding a wardrobe that really feels like ME. 32-year-old me, not 25-year-old me.

If I wasn’t sure about something, I physically tried it on and asked myself Does this make me feel confident? If I was shopping right now, today, would I buy this? If the answer to either was no, it was gone. No exceptions. That didn’t leave me with a whole lot - truly, anything I felt meh about, I got rid of. But what’s in there now are all things I truly love wearing. I can see what pieces I could really use now and take my time finding/investing in those things, and put together new outfits with versatile pieces in the meantime. I’ve also learned to be ok with being a repeater and I’ve embraced the idea of having a “signature style.” I know what I feel best in and what looks best on me — colors and styles — and I don’t feel the need to stray too far from that.

The extent of my hanging clothes on a 5 foot raCk. Jeans below and A 24-pair shoe organizer With room to spare, a 4-drawer Bin for swimsuits, hats, shorts, and workout clothes — socks, underwear, pajamas and t-shirts are in our shared dresser.

The extent of my jewelry, aside from my wedding rings, Aggie ring and the dainty gold jewelry I Wear every day.

As for jewelry - again, a ruthless edit. If it’s not something I’d pass down to my daughter or something truly timeless and classic that I reach for on a regular basis, time to go. Even if it was expensive. I got rid of probably 90% of my jewelry, packed certain things away to save for Steele, and invested in a couple things I’d had my eye on for a long time that I now wear day in and day out. 

For anything in my closet or dresser, I asked myself - do I feel any hesitation here? Why? Not in style, not MY style, uncomfortable, doesn’t fit quite right, worn out, tarnished, dingy… if any of those are true, I need to have the self respect to not wear something I don’t feel good in anymore. 

The other side of simplifying

Throughout this process, I’ve gotten more and more honest with myself. If I made a mistake and shouldn’t have bought something when I did - live and learn. Move on from it. Doesn’t mean I need to keep it. Loved it then but don’t love it as much now? It served me for a season and it’s ok for that season to be over. Never really loved it? Not worth your mental energy to hang onto, and now you know better. Over time, the simplifying process started to snowball into other areas - digital spaces (culling/deleting emails and iPhone photos daily, digital photo organization + regular backups, social media follow purge, etc.), our paper filing system, our pantry, our drop zone by the door - less, less, less.

For me, the greatest tradeoff is the headspace and mental capacity I have now to focus on more important things. To buy things with intention and patience and to be EXCITED about what’s in our home. To spend way less time picking up and organizing. To be able to breathe deeply and feel happy when I open my closet or walk into the living room every morning.

The size of our house used to stress me out - when we first found out we were expecting twins, I was overwhelmed thinking about the STUFF that would come with 2 more kids and worrying how we were all going to fit. How would our home not feel cramped 24/7? But after a year of taking intentional steps to simplify, I don’t feel like that any more. We have less in this house now than we did before our boys came along. Our home brings me joy. It’s a place I enjoy spending our days and I really don’t want to leave it anytime soon.

One year into some big changes and it feels GOOD. If you’re feeling stuck when it comes to living with less, decorating with less, or simplifying - message me! This is something I’m really passionate about and I’m always happy to chat.

Three Babies Later... Baby Items We've Loved + Ones We Wouldn't Miss

With lots of friends and clients expecting their first babies or soon to enter that season, I wanted to share some of my very favorite baby items we’ve used over the last few years.

Despite what the internet might tell you, you really don’t need a whole lot for babies, and I was grateful for insight from seasoned mama friends who approached their own registries and purchases with a super practical, minimalist mindset. We joined the three under two club for a while after the arrival of our twin boys and after living and learning a little more this go-round, we actually ended up using even fewer baby items with them than we did with our first. Less truly is more!

That said, these are the items I’d absolutely want on my baby registry if I had to do it all over again with the least amount of stuff possible. If it’s on this list, I’ve loved it times three!

LINKS UPDATED JANUARY 2025!

Favorite Baby Items by Category

SLEEP

Taking Cara Babies sleep class | We bought her sleep course after hearing glowing reviews from several friends and watched the videos before Steele was born, and again before the boys arrived as a refresher. Her classes go beyond sleep training and taught us so much about caring for a newborn in general - schedules, cues, and more. Andrew and I agree it was some of the best money we spent. Moms on Call is another popular course!
MOM TIP: Sleep training is of course a personal decision every family needs to make for themselves, but we’re continually thankful we did it – and surprisingly, it really wasn’t much harder with two than with one! There’s crying involved, yes, but not crying it out - the whole point is to avoid that. Six to eight weeks of implementing her strategies was completely worth the results. They’ve all slept 12 hours in their cribs every night since they were 3-4 months old and fall asleep on their own within minutes, and for our family, it’s been the absolute best scenario all the way around.

Hatch Rest sound machine | Lots of families choose not to use white noise, but we keep the volume pretty low and just helps us not feel like we have to tiptoe around the house when they’re asleep.
MOM TIP: The Better Sleep white noise phone app works great when we’re out and about. I’ll play it through the car speakers if I need them to nap on the go!

Overnight diaper pads | Total game changer. As our babies grew and were taking bigger bottles, they started soaking through their diapers onto their pajamas and sheets overnight. These really do absorb a LOT and they’ve helped all three go 12 hours at night while staying dry.

FEEDING

Nuk Simply Natural bottles | Very affordable compared to other brands, super easy to clean (minimal parts), and they haven’t given us any issues with gas. We bought the standard 9oz size from the get-go and they’ve worked for the entire first year for all 3 babies – no need to buy multiple sizes.
MOM TIP: I stick the lids + nipples in these dishwasher baskets and wash everything on the sanitize cycle overnight, and that’s the extent of our bottle-washing routine! We keep it simple – no need for endless scrubbing or a bulky bottle sanitizer – but we do use these sanitizing bags (also great for breast pump parts) when we know we’ll be somewhere without a dishwasher.

Oxo Tot bottle drying rack | I read reviews about the grass style racks growing mold - no thanks. This one’s been great! Holds a lot and is easy to wash clean.

Oxo Tot forks and spoons | Easy for little hands to hold and the spoon actually holds a good amount - my babies take big bites! Ha.

Silicone bibs | Our only bibs. The fold to catch spills is a must and they’re SO easy to clean. Each kid has 2 and that’s been plenty.

Muslin burp cloths | Thick, large, super absorbent, hold up well in the wash, and inexpensive. I have a kitchen drawer stocked full of these.

Space-saving high chair - our kitchen/dining area isn’t huge, so I wanted a chair that took up the least amount of space possible - bought this kind for Steele and got a matching one before the boys arrived. Love that it’s so compact, easy to clean (I didn’t want anything with fabric padding - it inevitably gets stained and gross over time), the tray is slim so it doesn’t take up a ton of room in the dishwasher, and it has a footrest to encourage correct eating posture - makes a huge difference for babies learning to eat. Can’t beat the price, either. This space-saving option is beautiful, too!

Ingenuity floor seat with built-in tray - we had a Bumbo for Steele but I bought two of these for the boys because I liked the price, color, and built-in tray storage much better. When the boys were sitting up but still little, we took these instead of high chairs when we traveled. Also love that it buckles onto a chair as a booster seat later on!

TRAVEL

Chicco Bravo carrier/car seat base/stroller combo | Had these infant seats for all 3! Great safety ratings, awesome reviews and the entire combo system costs less than a lot of car seats and strollers cost separately these days. We’ve been really happy with it all!

Graco Slim Fit convertible car seat | The winner after lots of research on seats that fit 3-across on a bench seat. This one converts up to a booster and is a fraction of the price of the “luxe” brands. Moms - real talk - no one cares what brand your kid’s car seat is. Price doesn’t always equal safety or comfort, so don’t think you necessarily need to spend more!
MOM TIP: @safeintheseat is a certified car seat expert and a great account to follow for safety tips. As she says - the safest car seat is one that’s installed correctly. Steele is still rear-facing at 3 years old and will be for as long as possible thanks to her advice!

Infantino Flip convertible carrier | This was a hand-me-down that’s quickly become a favorite. To me, it feels a lot more secure than wraps or slings. I tried a few of those but was worried the whole time baby was going to fall out the bottom. This one is very affordable, super easy to put on and feels very secure but not bulky. We bought a second one before the twins arrived!

BATHING + HEALTH

Bath flower | A must for preemies! The regular baby bathtubs (love this simple design) didn’t work for our teeny babies until they hit about 8-9 pounds.

Stelatopia Cleansing Oil | Steele never had any reaction to soaps or shampoos, but for our sensitive skin boys, we’ve tried LOTS of brands and Mustela Stelatopia has been our favorite!
MOM TIP: with Steele, I used to think a bath was a necessary part of her nighttime routine even though I knew she wasn’t really dirty. With the boys, giving both of them a bath every night is just too overwhelming, so we don’t. We bathed them twice a week until they were 8 months old, and now we do just every other night for all 3 unless they’re filthy. Don’t stress yourself out over bath time - fewer baths is better for their skin anyway.

Triple Paste | The only diaper rash cream I bought the second time around. Nothing compares. A little goes a long way - the big container lasted us a year!

Butt spatula | No sticky hands – just spread the cream, wipe the excess off on the clean diaper and you’re done!

Vicks Speed Read Thermometer | The hospital recommended an underarm thermometer (better accuracy) for the boys after their NICU stay. We’ve liked this quick read one!

MISCELLANEOUS

SnuggleMe Organic | Used this alllll the time for the first 4 months. I prefer the SnuggleMe over the Dock-a-Tot because it really does snuggle them in close and tight – the middle piece of fabric is suspended and taut, so when you lay baby on it, it pulls the sides in close. Big fan of the generic off-brand covers vs. the brand name, but definitely get some sort of cover because washing the lounger itself is a pain.

Piano play mat | Bought a second one for the boys so they could each have their own – not sure what exactly it is about this thing that’s so magical but it kept all 3 of mine entertained for many, many hours throughout their first year.

Fat Brain toys | Again, not sure what’s so magical here but a favorite for all 3 babies.

Foam tile floor mat | Wish I would’ve found this sooner! Love the neutral colors, it’s big for the price and so nice for the learning to sit/crawl phase.

Name Bubbles labels | The Daycare Pack of name labels comes with a good variety of sizes. We’ve had these on cups, nap mats and extra pairs of clothes for 2 years now and never had an issue with any coming off in the dishwasher or washing machine. Love these!

I can think of a few other items we used quite a bit (pack n plays, diaper bags, bassinets, baby gates, stand-up activity center, bouncy chairs) but I just didn’t love ours enough to put them on this list.

Baby Items We Didn’t Use

Here’s what I purged or didn’t end up using like I thought I would:

Socks and mittens - they just do not stay on those tiny hands and feet! Ha. Most of our onesies had the fold-over built-in mittens and we kept blankets over their legs and feet, so they weren’t necessary anyway.

A million pacifiers and clips - for some reason, pre-babies, I thought we’d need a TON of pacifiers. Not the case. Three or four (a couple for the house, a couple for the car/diaper bag) was plenty.

Diaper pail - we ended up getting rid of ours after the boys were born. With 2x the diapers, it filled up so quickly and changing the bags became more of a hassle than it was worth. And the refills are expensive! We got a separate trash can with a good lid for stinky diapers and keep it in the garage.

Wipe warmer - some swear by it. My kids never minded a cold wipe, and the wipes only stay warm for a few seconds anyway, so this was one less thing I wanted on the changing table.

Fancy pajamas - I got a few pairs of really nice, stretchy bamboo pajamas for Steele, and don’t get me wrong, they were great. I just couldn’t bring myself to spend $40 a pair on pajamas for two growing, messy baby boys, so we skipped those this time around. Whichever PJs you get, ZIPPER is key.

Baby detergents and baby dish soap - truly, a marketing ploy.

Sleep sacks - I feel like we might be the only family in America that doesn’t use sleep sacks. We did use Merlin’s Magic Sleep Suits with all 3 to help them transition out of the swaddle once they could roll over, but after that, just PJs. Tons of people love sleep sacks, but definitely not a necessity.

Baby swing/Mamaroo - nothing against them, we just didn’t have the space. A bouncy chair always worked fine and is a lot easier to move around the house.

Baby Brezza - loved by many, but for us it didn’t save enough time or effort to be worth the cost or counterspace. If you’re breastfeeding/pumping and needing to warm stored milk, a bottle warmer is probably worth having, but for our formula babies, we followed the advice of a friend to feed them room temp bottles from the start, so we don’t own a warmer, either. We’ve always kept a big water dispenser in our pantry filled with distilled or purified water for bottles.

Hook-on travel high chair - way more trouble than it’s worth, IMO. Used it maybe once, ever.

Owlet Smart Sock - everyone is different, but for me personally, the Owlet was stressful. I didn’t use one with Steele and never thought twice about it, but one of the twins had some apnea/oxygen issues in the NICU, so I borrowed an Owlet sock from a friend when we brought him home for peace of mind. It helped calm my nerves for about a week, but after that, it ended up making me more hyperaware, anxious, stressed, etc., and wasn’t the easiest to put on correctly anyway (I got a lot of error readings), so I put it back in the box and decided it wasn’t for us.

Boppy pillow - I didn’t find it comfortable or helpful for feeding (I may be in the minority on that) so we didn’t keep it. We did get the Twin Z pillow for the boys though, and that’s been a life saver for simultaneous bottle feeds and support while they were learning to sit!

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That’s a wrap on my very favorite items for newborns - ones I’ve used threefold and would buy again if I had to! Did I miss anything? Share your faves in the comments! Hopefully this list can help you in some small way!

To the Mom of a Toddler and Twins on the Way

Mama, I keep thinking about you! Eight months into life with twins and a toddler, I keep thinking about the things I wish someone would’ve told me, and the things I’ve taken away from this journey so far. I know your heart is racing with worry and exhaustion those last few weeks of carrying those babies, and I hope you’re feeling so loved and cared for as you get ready to meet them. I hope you feel some peace amidst the unrest.

You’ll soon find out - your situation is not something anyone else can really understand unless they’re living it. For better or for worse. You’ll be annoyed when people say “Mine are close in age, so I get it.” Nope. It’s not the same. You have two tiny humans needing you in the exact same ways, at the exact same time, all day every day — oh and a toddler, too. You’ll feel alone in your struggles pretty often. Or maybe that you’re so entrenched in motherhood these days that you begin to lose sight of the you that exists beyond these precious babies.

I’ve had some of my hardest, darkest days in this season. The sensory overload is real and beyond overwhelming. Touched out, cried out, trying to function in a constant state of chaos, give a damn busted, guilt over said give a damn being busted… but also days where I’ve never felt stronger or more capable in my entire life. Taking two or even three somewhere by myself sounds so simple, but man, you’ll feel like a badass when you get the hang of going places with them, without help. Or when they’re all fed, occupied and happy at home and maybe you can enjoy a cup of coffee with only one reheat instead of three. You’ll feel on top of the world!

This year has refined me so much - iron in the fire. Coming home from the hospital leaving two babies in the NICU an hour away. Powering through tasks that I didn’t give a second thought to with one baby but feel straight up daunting with two (or three). On the days I’ve felt like I had nothing else to give. Not an ounce. When I’ve taken deep breaths and given myself pep talks as I dig in a little deeper, mentally and physically, just to be able to just make it to the next nap. When I take a step back, I know it’s all refining me. As a mom, a wife, a human.

All I can tell you is to let yourself release every expectation that flashes through your mind. Let go of all the “shoulds.” That’s been the hardest part for me. Especially when I compare the twins to my oldest and think things like “I should be doing more with them. I did so much with her.” Outings. Activities. Baby led weaning. Reading. Snuggling. All of it. Let it go and embrace the bare minimum sometimes. You’ll all be better for it. What worked for one might not make sense for two. These babies’ first year just won’t look like your oldest’s did - there’s no way it could! Different but still wonderful. No one is giving out Mom awards. Everyone just gets a participation trophy here, so take advantage. Do what you need to do to make it through each day and let that be good enough. All three of your babies are still so loved. That’s truly all that matters.

Remember the oxygen mask rule. Always put yours on first. Set a crying baby down and go pee. Brush your hair. Brush your teeth, please. Eat lunch. Take a sip of water. Take a breath. Let the laundry pile stay unfolded and sit down for five whole minutes. Our culture has gone a little far with the whole over-glorification of motherhood as martyrdom and the self care obsession, but at the same time - don’t neglect your basic needs, mama. You cannot pour from an empty cup.

This isn’t for the faint of heart. You’ll wish every single day that you had an extra set of hands. Or that you could sneak in a nap while your babies all nap, just one time, but the to-do list will win out and you’ll try to be productive. You’ll lie awake for hours at night even though you’re exhausted because that’s when your brain and your shoulders can finally decompress. Every new phase of your twins’ babyhood will present its own challenges, as will trying to parent and disciple a toddler while your attention and patience are both spread thin. You’ll all make it through. Lean on your support system. Don’t be afraid to ask for help or just to vent. Ditch the comparison game. Embrace the chaos and the mess. Get a Twin Z pillow. Do whatever you need to do to make life easier for yourself. Spend one on one time with your oldest. Say the words “oh well” more often.

You can do hard things!

Love,
A mom in the thick of it.

P.S.
Not sure if this was so much a letter to you as it was another pep talk to myself. Either way - cheers to us, mama.

Bullard Boys | Newborn Photos

The Bullard boys are HOME! Hayes McCall and Harrison Shepler (Shep) joined us September 3, 2021, at 9:25 and 9:26 in the morning, weighing 5lbs 9oz and 4lbs 11oz. Both boys needed a little help maintaining their body temps, taking full feeds without wearing themselves out, and making sure they were breathing steady without any apnea episodes. Our two-week NICU stay wasn’t fun (especially with a one-hour commute to the hospital) but they’re home at last and we’re living in a state of exhausted bliss, still not quite believing these three kiddos are ours. Big sister has had a little bit of a tough time adjusting and doesn’t love when mom and dad are holding the boys and don’t have any free hands left for her, but when either of her brothers cry she’s sure to let us know. I think she’ll warm up to them before long.

I was trying to remember if I ever even blogged Steele’s newborn photos and discovered I blogged a few of them here, along with our picks for must-have baby items. So far, this list still holds true with twins, too!

Without further ado, here are our boys and their sweet big sister. How lucky are we to call them ours.